Twilight Cliches Revisited!
by MonSolo23
Summary: This is my attempt to write original stories from overdone ideas, keeping everyone in character and using proper grammar and spelling. When bad ideas meet good writing, who will prevail?


**So you've all seen them: the stories that pop up over and over and over. What if Edward never came back in New Moon? What if Bella was turned by another vampire? What if the Cullens were in a rock band? **

**What if someone took these overused ideas and seriously attempted to write a good story? It is possible for writing to trump the concept. I never would've expected a movie about a killer videotape to be good, but "The Ring" is still the creepiest movie I've ever seen.**

**Here are the rules that I'm setting for myself:**

**I will not write characters out of character (OOC). This means, as much as possible, that they will act and react the way they do in the books.**

**I will make sure my grammar, spelling, and sentence structure are error-free.**

**I will not write script chapters. They're fun, but it's not the format I want for this story.**

**A "serious attempt" at good writing does not mean the stories will have no humor. **

**If a story is set in an alternate universe (AU) I will explain the decision the characters made that made the alternate reality possible.**

**If I attempt any "all human" stories, the characters will not be OOC.**

**I will not write original stories with Twilight names.**

**I will not re-write Twilight with original names.**

**I will not write a "Bella's pregnant" fic. There was already a serious attempt at that cliché. It was called **_**Breaking Dawn**_**.**

**To start us off, here's my attempt at the Cullens reading Twilight fanfiction!**

Alice couldn't stop laughing. "What's so funny?" Bella called to her.

"Nothing!" Alice called back. "And don't you dare come in my room!"

Edward rolled his eyes. "It's something on her computer," he informed Bella. "She's trying not to think about it, though."

Bella thought for a moment. "Maybe we should just leave her be," she said. "But where's the fun in that?" She took a step toward Alice's room.

"Esme will kill you if you do that," Alice warned her. "She installed these doors herself."

"I got the website address," Edward whispered to Bella. His eyes twinkled. "Let's go use my computer."

His computer booted up, and they logged on to the site. "What is this?" Bella asked, confused. "It looks like…stories? About _us_?"

"Oh, not this one," Edward said, pointing. "This one's about you…and Jasper?"

Bella's mouth dropped open in shock. "What?" Her eyes scanned the page. "What the hell does this mean? 'AH, AU, OOC'?"

Alice spoke up from directly behind them. "It means bad news," she informed them. "Do you remember that journalist we sold our story to? She published it as a work of fiction…"

"SHE wrote this?" Edward cried, his eyes blazing.

"No! No, this is stuff written by the people who read her books."

"Are you sure?" Bella asked. Her eyes had caught another story blurb. "I mean, according to this one, I was abused by Charlie and then I joined a rock band."

"This looks like algebra," Edward added, pointing to another story. "What does 'ExJ' mean?"

Alice burst out laughing. "Those are the characters who are 'together' in that story…I'm assuming the 'E' is for you, Edward. And the 'J'…well, it's probably Jacob, although it could be Jasper. Or maybe even Jessica."

Bella shook her head in disbelief. "Who comes up with these stories?"

Alice shrugged. "Does it really matter? We know they're not real, so…I mean, I don't let it bother me."

"Oh, really?" Edward asked. "What about a story where you leave Jasper for Mike Newton?"

She hissed in rage. "They didn't!" she cried.

Edward chuckled. "They did. You're right, Alice. This is highly amusing." He clicked on the link to read the first chapter.

"Don't you dare!" Alice snapped. She slammed Edward's laptop shut.

**Please read and review! Question for the reviewers: what cliches should I tackle next? I'm planning on a New Moon AU story (if Edward never came back) but what else do you want to see? Also, if you have other examples of well-done cliches, please let me know! I'd love to spotlight other stories here too.**


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